Post Chinese New Year.

To my fan base:

Since Chinese New Year, not much has happened.  It was a pretty lazy two weeks.  Classes were canceled for Chinese New Year February 2- 4, then last week were semester one exams.  My coteacher wanted me to monitor this test, aka play the bad guy and stop them from cheating.  I refused to do this for a few reasons.  First, every test that we have, he never does anything while I try to find the offenders and has never once marked a paper or even told me that someone was in fact cheating.  Second, he made the test.  I have no problem monitoring my own test because I know that we have covered literally everything on that test 3 times and that the students are capable of doing very well.  But when I looked at his test, it was way to hard for them and some of the answers didn’t make sense.  I was stuck between a rock and a hard place because it’s incredibly insulting for me to tell him that the test isn’t good or is too tough, so I had to tell him that Peace Corps doesn’t allow me to sit in for the semester exams, which isn’t the case, but when in doubt, blame a Peace Corps policy.  The next reason is that I don’t know what he is doing behind the scenes- did he give the test to the students already?  This isn’t me being paranoid because both of my co-teachers did that for every test last year.  The last reason is because the semester tests are really important to the students’ grades.  If I come down really hard on them in my class, while every other grade 10 student is cheating and copying, it’s really not fair to my students.  I want them to learn the material on a monthly basis, but these tests determine which class they will be placed in for grade 11.  So, because of all of these reasons, I opted out of the tests.  My co-teacher seemed to be satisfied with my reasoning.  If I have learned anything here, it’s that some battles aren’t meant to be fought, and that was one.  Blaming Peace Corps is a fool-proof excuse because not many people are familiar with the intricate policies and protocol, including most Peace Corps volunteers, so it’s usually a safe bet.  But it’s not a card to be played all the time; it’s a special occasion card. 

As always seems to happen here, a two week lull usually leads up to a month of endless projects.  This weekend really saw the start of my busy streak that will take my right into April.  It’s crunch time for our International Women’s Day because some of the volunteers have to spend time in Phnom Penh for training, so this week will be really crucial to making sure that we get it done.  The last minute running around stuff is old hat now, so that isn’t even stressful.  But on Saturday, a group of us cranked out the budget and schedule, which will make for a very informative event.  The theme for the year is “Strong Women, Strong Cambodia: Balancing Education, Family, Health and Tradition”.  Kind of long, but it basically nails it.  We will have three guest speakers- the first is (hopefully!) Darlene’s co-teacher Phanet (the woman who takes us to the fortune tellers).  She will be talking about self-esteem and how to gain confidence.  She’s an incredible teacher and friend, she supports her family and balances the roles very well.  The second speaker is our doctor for Peace Corps.  She survived Pol Pot and studied in Vietnam and America.  She’s going to talk to the girls about how she really values all aspects of her life and how she created the balance between doctor/wife/mother/daughter.  She’ll be really great for the girls because she is from the countryside and her family was very poor and she is really a self-made woman.  The last speaker has yet to be solidified, but if all goes according to plan, she will make a presentation about feminine health and hygiene and reproductive health.  There are many misconceptions about feminine health because girls are usually too scared or shy to ask about something because they don’t want to seem different or weird.  And it may seem like the girls are too young for reproductive health, but in a country where 25 is considered past marrying age, juniors and seniors in high school are the perfect audience.  We will also put on a skit about health advocacy.  Many people, men and women alike, do not ask enough questions when they go to the health center or a hospital. This skit will demonstrate how typically people just accept what the doctors say and have no idea what it even means.  Then we will show them a woman who asks many questions and leave more informed and in better control of her health or that of her family.  We are all really looking forward to it, but this week will be filled with invitations, meetings, translations and seeking out funding (any ideas are more than welcome!)

I’m starting my Life Plans Club, but I want to change the name to Life Skills.  I met with my contact at the university and expressed that I don’t want to lecture or do something that can only apply to a few students (I have less than 5 months left now!).  So the solution was Life SKILLS Club, which will be a weekly workshop, held in 6 different sessions, which will probably have around 200 participants overall, and we will focus on one skill every week.  The first lesson is on goal setting, how to set them and how to achieve them.  Seems simple, but this lesson usually goes untaught because there aren’t many sports teams and classrooms are much different here.  The other lessons will include: resume writing, resume building, cover letter writing, interviewing and professional skills, basic nutrition and one other topic that I haven’t thought of yet (any suggestions are more than welcome!) 

I am also planning an event for the 50^th anniversary of Peace Corps, but I don’t want to jinx my project proposal, so I will fill you in on that once it’s approved, but it’s good….

Every Peace Corps volunteer has a very different experience, but also seems to learn the same important goals.  One of the best examples I can think of to demonstrate this is the group of students that I work with who went to America.  They are in the beginning stages of launching their Green Club, of which I will be their first member.  They learned the skills to create and carry out a project, and I have the opportunity to not lead them, but rather follow them.  They have an awesome plan and I will be there whenever they need help, but I think that my role will be more of a trainee, which is very humorous to all of us. 

The other thing that I have been able to be a part of is the opposite of a cross cultural exchange.  I am always making an effort to represent America and engage in discussions about Cambodia and America.  It’s one of the most important jobs as a volunteer, I think. I write in this blog to inform my friends and family about this incredible country that I am in.  When I come home, I will continue to spread what I have learned here, but with this blog, I am able to share my stories and insight into Cambodia on a larger scale (I have a fan base in India, Germany and South Korea, who knew!)   But since they have gone to America, I am able to see their interpretation of America as a Cambodia.  It’s incredibly fascinating to hear them inform others about America. 

I was sitting in their presentation this weekend when Reaksemey, a totally pistol, made a few comments that really stuck with me.  The first was that Americans all appreciate honesty.  I have heard them say this before, but then it hit me, we say the exact same thing about Cambodians.  Every single Peace Corps Volunteer has been called fat during her time here.  As an American, this is one of the most honest things that anyone has said to me.  But these students were talking about how Americans want a straight answer, especially when asked about oneself, for example: “why did you do that?” In Cambodia, you would never ask anyone that because they put their reputation on the line.  Maybe that is the case in America, but it’s a saving grace if someone can admit to what they did, but here that is a loss of face.  It’s funny to me how one word can mean something so different to two different countries.  It also puts me in check about making gross generalizations about other countries when a student says “American kids can do anything that they want” or that “Americans don’t respect old people”.  If they stayed with my family during my upbringing, they would probably be singing a much different tune.

The next thing that she said was that during some events, there were things that happened that they didn’t understand.  For me, this happened when I first came here and the bathroom was a hole in the ground and a big water basin.  For them, it was going to the university bathroom and not understanding the automatic sinks, soap dispensers and hand driers.  The difference is clearly superficial, but if there is or isn’t technology, how universal is that embarrassing feeling that you have absolutely no idea what the hell is going on.  Raya, the group leader, told me that the first time, he thought that he had to place his feet in a certain way and spent about 5 minutes understanding what was happening. 

The last comment was one that I will never forget.  Reaksemey is wise beyond her years and incredibly mature for her young age of 19 and continues to prove a common perception, that teachers can learn a lot from their students.  Her dad, who had incredible English, asked the group to explain the main cultural differences between America and Cambodia.  There were two fathers there who spoke English, but the other parents couldn’t speak a word and clearly were a little overwhelmed to be sitting in an air-conditioned room with the Embassy, looking at a slideshow while their son or daughter spoke rapid English about a country that they knew very little about.  But Reaksemey’s response was that “we always think that we’re right and we shouldn’t judge other cultures because we think that what they are doing is wrong.” I thought that it was incredibly mature of her not to point out the obvious and vast differences between our cultures, but rather said something that made us all the same- that knee-jerk reaction to think that what the other person is doing doesn’t make sense or is wrong.  She then cited that in America, it’s ok that people shake hands/ touch and speak informally regardless of social status or age.  She said that it was strange at first for her, but then she realized that is just the way that it is, not right, not wrong but rather how people do things. 

I am surprised by the date every time I look at the calendar.  I am getting excited about coming home, but there is plenty to keep me in the zone.  I just like to plan and think ahead.  One thing that has been a major topic of conversation for us has been what people often refer to as the real world aka, a job.  I have already started looking for some jobs and updating me resume, but how can I briefly explain living in Cambodia on a resume.  Good thing I have about 5 months to figure that out.  I have started to make some plans for coming home, which thankfully will be in the summer, not in this wretched winter.  Although no plans are set in stone, mid-July- August will look a little something like this: Chicago, the east coast, job searching and lot and lots of family time.  Until then, it will be lots of teaching and sweating, because it’s officially hot season again.  Good news for my laundry, but bad news for my fan.